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Posted

I agree, I think everyone goes through strategies like that once in a while.

.

The best victory is when the opponent surrenders

of its own accord before there are any actual

hostilities...It is best to win without fighting.

- Sun-tzu

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Posted

I don't know how you can live with him, look at him, speak to him or allow him near your family.

"...or maybe you are carrying a large vicious dog in your pocket." -Scottnshelly

Posted
I guess I should have mentioned that I've been in my new house for abotu three weeks now. I couldn't let that continue.
Good for you :) Keep your family (and yourself!) safe, Mr. Mike :nod:

"Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go."

- T. S. Eliot

  • 6 months later...
Posted

First time i saw this thread Mike, having been directed to it by your link in the other thread. My comments...

Personally, i think your actions were exceedingly tame. I very likely would have thrown him against the wall and given him a taste of how close he had come to being dead. With his history, and then his 'violence' posed against your sister... and now your daughter, i would say he's too close for your comfort. Contacting his P.O. would have been appropriate, regardless of what came out of your mouth, or your fists. It's not an issue of merely keeping him in check with your daughter, but of recognizing he is nowhere near ready to live in this society and poses an ever-present threat to your immediate family.

"When you are able to take the keys from my hand, you will be ready to drive." - Shaolin DMV Test


Intro

Posted

Mr. Mike,

I think you did an excellent job of conflict resolution. Individuals like him are used to being in control and the aggressor. When they find themselves on the other side of the coin, they cower. A simple slap is all it took. Restraint doesn't seem like a strong enough word for what you displayed.

The only mistake I say you made was allowing him around your family. Thankfully no one was hurt and you learned your lesson. I've learned through experience that if things can get worse, they usually do.

The only thing for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.

Posted

Mr Mike,

What you did was just natural for a father in my opinion. I'm still single (only 18), but I know how my father would react if someone did that to me when I was still little (although i'm a boy).

4 years ago, we had this particularly violent policeman as a neighbour, and he would threaten you with his M16 for doing a simple thing, like looking at him (he did it to an engineer, don't ask me why, but men like him get away with their misdeeds).

I usually ignore him, although constant gunfire becomes annoying. He usually shoots at 'trespassing' cats (two of my cats died). It happened that a stray cat was walking on the common fence, and he fired.

Both my grandmother and mother was there.

My mother was shocked and was almost hospitalized while my grandmother become really quite for the rest of the day. I knew what was on her mind. She lived through World War2, and like many Asian countries, my country was heavily bombed by both sides. Maybe all the sounds of war came back to her.

Now when I learned this, I wanted to charge into his house and kill him. My father works outside the country, and I am the older son. Though I was 14 then, I wanted to kill him, rip apart his entrails. I want ed him to know how the two cats I've buried with their entrails out felt.Luckily I was calmed and stopped by a close girlfriend.

That thought still scares me... I never thought myself possible of thinking such things. I was the academic type, a dork if one might say.

From that day on, I trained myslef in the MA, armed and unarmed...and eventually I will enter the military...I became a changed person..I want to rise into the ranks, overtake him. Then I'm gonna 'remind' him of my two cats and the shock he brought to my family...

The stronger swordsman does not always win.

Posted

Things I would have done different.

First I come from an extremely abusive background for example the last time my father beat my mother he did so with a rifle.

Now if anyone knows anyone who is being abused they need support and they need to be educted with some self help knowledge fast. The individual must find it in themselves to remove themselves from this situation.

Second this person would have found himself waking up in recovery.

I know not everyone will agree with this but all this stuff about non-violent intervention is not always the answer. Sometimes you must set an example that these types of people will not be tolerated.

Maybe I feel this way because I was abused. Everyone in life at some point run into a metaphorical tree and sometimes someone has to be the tree.

Whoever appeals to the law against his fellow man is either a fool or a coward,

Whoever cannot take care of himself without that law is both,

For a wounded man shall say to his assailant, If I live I will kill you, If I die you are forgiven.

Such is the rule of HONOR!

Posted
Things I would have done different.

First I come from an extremely abusive background for example the last time my father beat my mother he did so with a rifle.

Now if anyone knows anyone who is being abused they need support and they need to be educted with some self help knowledge fast. The individual must find it in themselves to remove themselves from this situation.

Second this person would have found himself waking up in recovery.

I know not everyone will agree with this but all this stuff about non-violent intervention is not always the answer. Sometimes you must set an example that these types of people will not be tolerated.

Maybe I feel this way because I was abused. Everyone in life at some point run into a metaphorical tree and sometimes someone has to be the tree.

I agree. Growing up in a domestic violence home (as I call it) I too would have broken his jaw, then dealt with the talking aspect after he recovered. There is a line that I draw when it comes to violence. That line is crossed when you raise your hand to hit a women. Even more so, a family member of mine. The only thing I think you did wrong, was allow him back into the house.

I don't have to be the best, just better than you!


Working towards 11% BF and a Six pack

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