You just might be a Redneck Martial Artist...

[Kicks]

This is just for fun and not to offend anyone.

 

You just might be a Redneck Martial Artist...

 

 

 

...if after you put your belt on your name shows on the back of your belt, and its Bubba.

 

...if you have an oversized, brass rodeo belt buckle on your belt.

 

...if your dojang has spitoons in every corner.

 

...if during ground fighting practice you can't tell the girls from the boys.

 

...if footwork drills include avoiding cow patties.

 

...if your dojang has hay or saw dust covered floors.

 

Added:

 

...if your dojang sells shotguns shells next to the Nunchaku

 

...if you practice your throwing stars on a poster of a white tailed deer.

 

 

 

That's all I can think of for now. Can you add any?

Edited February 4, 2005 by Kicks

[Red J]

...If a tornado hits your dojo trailer and does $1000 worth of improvements.

 

...You have a Nascar/Budweiser gi.

 

...Your gi pants have a pocket sewn in them to hold your Copenhagen.

 

[June1]

ROFL!!! Ah... "Copenhagen."

[Kicks]

... if you think a side kick is that little guy that follows you where ever you go.

 

... if you think a knife hand is the hand you use to skin a buck.

 

...if you think a high punch is an alcoholic beverage.

Edited February 4, 2005 by Kicks

[Red J]

...all your techniques are named after cowboys (here comes a Roy Rogers)...

 

...you work out in your "Tony Lama" lizard skin boots...

 

...you have a picture of Hank Williams Jr. that you bow to...

 

...you have a Rebel Flag patch on your gi...

 

...you have a gi made of denim with a little red "Levis" tag...

 

[senna_trem]

...all your techniques are named after cowboys (here comes a Roy Rogers)...

That's my favourite, I can just see someone saying it in a deep southern drawl as they punch someone.

[Kicks]

... if that billboard in the lobby of your dojang that says, “Say No To Crack” reminds you to pull up your pants.

 

...if your child’s first words were, “cha ryuht, y'all”.

 

...if you vacuum your gi instead of washing it.

 

...if you break wind in class and blame it on your kid.

 

...if you’ve ever paid your tuition with pennies.

 

...if you ask the instructor “How’s it hanging?”

 

...if you can’t go to class without getting mud on your tires.

 

...if the most common phrase you hear at your belt test is “What the hell are you doing, Diphead?”

 

...if you think Tiger Balm is a miracle drug.

 

...if the sofa in your dojang's lobby came out of a Chevrolet.

[1kickKO]

...If you think kiah is something you do after you drink too much.

 

...If you wear a camoflauge gi

 

...If your dojo has monster truck paintings all over the walls instead of certificates

 

...If you If you swear that Jackie Chan is the name of something you popped the night before class.

[scottnshelly]

I'm from Oklahoma, so i've actually seen some of these, especially the copenhagen one. i wish i could add some, but i don't know what's not redneck!

 

Does everyone else listen to country music while warming up or doing musical katas?

[1kickKO]

Hahaha...well I don't do musical katas but I can't say that I would listen to country music while doing one.