Your Chance for Immortality

[Writer]

She was the only female who fought a thai boxing champion in a illegal under ground

 

Match in L.A. , it was bloody but short . thai boxer was dead in less than a minute in the hands of some of the biggest south asia gamblers , she disappeared but cost them more than $10 million in lost debt…..

 

Nice PAI. I like that alot. As it turns out she did go underground two years earlier after taking out a terrorist organization. But she could have a past.

 

Chin-na is interesting sounding but too obscure for the average reader. Seven Star - why only a brown belt in Brazilian jiu jitsu?

 

"Jiu jutsu" I take it is the more proper term aka "jiu jitsu?" It sounds pretty good. Muay Thai won't work, sounds too much like a mixed drink.

 

I definitely like the underground champion idea better than formal contests.

 

This chick is pretty cool, by the way. Unshakable, dark hair, blue eyes. Likes fast motorcycles.

 

So lets say she's in a ring with a couple of bad *. The one she just took down is laying behind her, the toughest is in front of her. The guy on the mat behind her grabs her ankle. What's the coolest way to break his forearm? Just stomp down on it with her free foot with lightning speed?

[Shorin Ryuu]

I think it would be cooler to use the foot that was grabbed. She rotates her foot out of the grip and heel-stomps the forearm, crushing it. I figure we're going for fun, and not pure realism, so why not?

[monkeygirl]

Chin-na is interesting sounding but too obscure for the average reader. Seven Star - why only a brown belt in Brazilian jiu jitsu?

 

A little obscurity never hurt. For example, you could use "Goju Ryu Karate" or something (I'm sure I spelled it wrong, I'll pass it off as typos). It's obviously a form of martial arts, but adds a sense of mystery. Meanwhile, your genuine martial artist readers are impressed by your ability to cite an actual style instead of the generic "karate" tag that gets slapped on every Joe Miyagi dojo.

 

Forgive me if I'm wrong, but I think Seven Star is referring to the fact that a genuine black belt is extremely difficult to attain in Brazilian JiuJitsu. A brown belt is a pretty huge accomplishment in that style. It adds a sense of realism and believability.

 

For my suggestions: styles like TKD and Kung Fu are a little too general and "cheap" sounding, and/or don't fit what you're looking for.

 

You could always play the "Jeet Kun Do" card, which many argue is really more of a mindset than a style. Also, it was created by Bruce Lee, so that's a bonus. Depending on her "past", perhaps she received direct training from Bruce, or from one of his "disciples", and then she took things from there, adding to her repertoire as she saw fit, according to her training.

 

For the cool forearm-breaking:

 

The guy on the ground grabs her ankle and yanks it backwards. She starts to fall forward, twists midfall so she would land on her side (the same side as the ankle he grabbed), controls the landing and lands shoulder/arm first, meanwhile does an axe kick with her free leg so that her heel comes crashing down on his forearm. Then, (the bad guy having released his grip, and the toughest opponent running at her, now behind her) she does a backwards somersault towards the toughest guy and pushes hard with her arms while kicking out as if to do a handstand...except that she times and angles the double-kick (like stomping with both feet) to nail her opponent in the stomach, thereby launching him backwards. She lets her momentum carry her through the roll and then she's on her feet!

 

Of course, this tough guy could grab both of her feet...in which case, she could push up against him, causing him to resist (he'll be pushing down), then bend her knees and pull him to the ground in front of her. (the ol' letting-go-in-tug-of-war trick) Meanwhile she could grab his ankles so that as he falls he "pulls" her up. It would kind of look like a "circus roll".

 

Aah I love fantasy fight choreography, because it would probably never work if it wasn't all staged.

[SevenStar]

Chin-na is interesting sounding but too obscure for the average reader. Seven Star - why only a brown belt in Brazilian jiu jitsu?

 

"Jiu jutsu" I take it is the more proper term aka "jiu jitsu?" It sounds pretty good. Muay Thai won't work, sounds too much like a mixed drink.

 

no reason in particular - it can be black. As far as I know, there are no female brown or black belts, so either would be awesome.

 

jujutsu is the japanese term, and is the correct romanization. jujitsu was use alot in the 70's, but is technically incorrect. jiu jitsu was a seplling adopted by brazilians when bjj was developed.

 

As opposed to "muay thai", you can use "thai boxing".

[SevenStar]

The thing with underground competition is that people can't really relate to them

 

1. as far as most know, they don't exist - if we knew about them, they wouldn't be underground, would they?

 

2. because we don't know about them, we don't know who is fighting in them - everyone in the circuit may suck - it could be full of people who aren't good enough to be pro. If I beat some generic underground champ, who would care? But, if I KO'ed someone like tyson or lewis, everyone would be able to visualize my skill level.

[TheDevilAside]

Why not have her fighting ability come from some elite military training program? Like Jason Bourne, the character in the Bourne series by Robert Ludlum (sweet movies, too ). Or kind of like that movie Equilibrium. I don't know, "Dragon-Scale Kung Fu Blackbelt" (heh, or something) and "Special Weapons and Tactics operative" just doesn't mix too well, in my opinion.

 

As for naming rank, I would leave that out. Most of the time rank is as diverse as the martial art itself. A purple belt means very little in one, and the world in another.

 

I would have the file say something like "She trained extensively and excelled in X forms of combat."

[MenteReligieuse]

Or kind of like that movie Equilibrium.

 

Gun-kata SUCKED!

[siufeifei]

I'd have to say that if you don't know about it now, you aren't going to be able to realistically write about the fighting style of the character, no matter how much research you are going to do in the future. Why do you need to have a fixed style? Why does she have to have a grade or rank? I think if you choose to name her style then you are a)limited by that style(s) b) stepping into cliche territory c) risking writing about something you do not know about. The end result is that either people will ask questions that you don't or can't answer, or just laugh at what you have written for lack of credible realism.

 

One thing i want to point out. I have a passionate hatred towards the modern fantasy type books where the hero/ine is an almost perfect, invincible and can survive and conquer all single handedly in spite of being totally outnumbered etc. etc.

 

Boring Boring Boring.

[Writer]

The thing with underground competition is that people can't really relate to them

 

1. as far as most know, they don't exist - if we knew about them, they wouldn't be underground, would they

 

I think "underground" carries great romanticism. The idea of chain link cages; battles to the death, no-holds barred fights, dark, smoky arenas and dangerous surroundings fits well with this character. Who's to say what will be underground 300 years from now, but with the world's population approaching ten billion (or whatever), there will probably be some pretty bad places. Imagine a beautiful 20 year old chick in this setting. Cool, understated, waiting to explode.I don't like the squeaky clean MA champions like Norris or Jeff Wincott.

 

You're right about kung fu. Too pedestrian. Jeet Kun Do has a ring. What is it, an offshoot?

 

Forget government training. She grew up learning things they can't teach you in a big beauracracy, which is why she's the best we've got.

[siufeifei]

But what is your future like? What has happened to the world since today? What is the culture like? What new technology? What is society like? What is government like?

 

Answering those questions will help you no-end in developing not just your main charcter but also every other character that will feature in your story.

 

Once you have established the world in which she lives in, you can then start to create her back history. Where was she born, what was the circumstances of her birth, what were her family like her education and basically everything else that makes a character.

 

Typical examples would be the grungy, dirty, Bladrunner type futures where everything is almost the same except darker and more grotty and more corrupt. Your character could then be someone who was born in the lower or higher levels of society but for some reason she climbed or fell from her position. Following some events she came into the emplyment/possession of some kind of agency that sees potential for her skills.

 

Now that you have a simple outline you can construct stories.

 

For example, if she was from the lowere levels of society then she would've had to learnt to survive rough streets and gangs etc etc. He fighting style would then be a little unorthodox, simple but effective, precise but a little messy. On the other hand, if she was of the higher levels of society then maybe she did learn from a "Master" of martial arts. This does mean that you have to decide what has happened to the martial arts in the past three hundred years. IF she has learnt a traditional art then maybe here's where you can input a little flaw into her. Maybe she can fight using her martial art but she doesn't have experience in making it work effectively. This would mean that as she progresses, her skills improve. It brings a level of intereaction between her and her enviroment and situations that makes it a bit more interesting inste4ad of "she kills them all..... again....with her bare hands..... and a cotton bud...... quickly...... yawn......"