I don't understand

[Lyds]

Why do guys hate fighting girls in tournements. I'm a girl and have been competeing for 12 years in Shotokan karate and whenever I go to fight a guy they get mad or just tell me they don't want to fight me... What is wrong? Just wondering.....

[Beiner]

Societal values ingrained males into a chivalrous role. Guys don't like hitting girls, were told its wrong, so when it comes up , its a pain in the butt to get over the stigma that society has indoctrinated us with.

[TheDevilAside]

I don't get mad over it, I just politely refuse to fight a girl, in contact-sparring anyway. Light-contact, point-sparring is fine, because I'm not aiming to do any physical damage. However, there's no way in hell I'd fight a girl in a full-contact sparring situation, even with full gear on.

 

Yes, it has to do with chivarly, but I wouldn't call it stigma.

 

Don't we see this in the animal kingdom? Don't lions usually only pick fights with other lions, and not lionesses?

[DLopez]

I sparred against a girl in sparring once. That was the last time I'll do it too.

 

She was pretty good, but whenever I caught her with a ridge hand to the side of the head, or kicked to her torso, she'd claim I was hitting too hard. Now, I'd already had three matches against guys and not a single one of them claimed I was hitting too hard, but now all of a sudden I was. Okay, fine, I eased up, but then the ring judges stoppedcalling my punches or kicks as scores. They said they wanted to see me put more into it, make it look like a kick or punch, not just a push or a touch.

 

Now get this, she'd already won her previous three matches by getting her opponents (all females) disqualified for hitting too hard. So in trying not to lose this match on disqualification, I went easy and she edged me by 1 point.

 

Essentially, I was fighting handcuffed and couldn't do what I would do against another guy for fear of losing on a disqualification.

 

Now, I certainly don't mind losing a match against anyone, and she was pretty good, but the fact she would feign injury to win on disqualifications left me with little respect for her.

 

I know it comes off as me being a poor sport, but it was obvious we weren't sparring on even terms. Ya, after that experience, I have to say that guys fighting against girls in the ring is pretty pointless, IMO.

 

I'm sure there are many women that don't play games like that, and would like to go head to head to see how they measure up, but I don't find the idea of being disqualified and gaining a rep for not having control very appealing just to find those kinds of women.

 

[White Warlock]

Why do guys hate fighting girls in tournements.

Was never in this situation at a tournament. However, while i'm willing to workout with a woman, i am not willing to harm one. And as i am not willing to compromise my values for my martial art studies, i will nonetheless compromise them for my survival or security.

 

So yes, it's about social norms. Values ingrained through childhood, by both parents and society as a whole. Not everyone has these values. Most that don't, also think beating their wives is a viable means to disciplining them. The stigma goes the other way.

[foreveryoung001]

Now, I certainly don't mind losing a match against anyone, and she was pretty good, but the fact she would feign injury to win on disqualifications left me with little respect for her.

 

I agree with most of the post about the reasons.

 

This situation, though, about feigning injury to win, is not exclusive to woman. I wound up DQ'd this past spring when I was sparring a guy. I was doing very well against him, I was up 5 to 1 against him, when I caught him on the side of the ehad with a ridge hand. He went down in a heap, claiming I poked him in the eye. Loss of a point to me. Then I caught him with an axe kick, and layed out on the floor. I kneeled for about 2 minutes while he slowly tried to regain his feet. As soon as he was somewhat standing, they DQ'd me, and he jumped up like nothing was wrong, went and high fived his buddies, who were all laughing and joking around. The center ref came up to me later and apologized for his call, but the damage was done.

[Fenris-wolf]

I'm surprised no one else mentioned this - apart from "chivalry" and the like, it's pretty much a lose-lose situation for them. If they win, they bet up a girl, and if they lose, they got beaten up by a girl. It's irritating, but I can see where they're coming from.

I don't get mad over it, I just politely refuse to fight a girl, in contact-sparring anyway. Light-contact, point-sparring is fine, because I'm not aiming to do any physical damage. However, there's no way in hell I'd fight a girl in a full-contact sparring situation, even with full gear on.

 

Yes, it has to do with chivarly, but I wouldn't call it stigma.

 

Don't we see this in the animal kingdom? Don't lions usually only pick fights with other lions, and not lionesses?

 

I think using the animal kingdom as a reason or to back up your arguments is pretty annoying really. What in all the hells has that got to do with you as a human being? Many animals kill their own young, I hardly think that is pertinant when related to human beings.

 

I'm personally reasonably anti-"chivalry", and do you know why? I see it as sexism - from the woman. If a woman wants to be treated as an equal, to interact with men as a person and not be seen as less by them, why should a man be expected to then treat them as if they were made of china? It's nice to be romantic with your girlfriend or whatever, but then I like to return the favour - I do not expect special treatment and find it unpleasant even if it's along the lines of politeness as it simply reinforces my image as a woman and thus an alien creature.

 

I do Muay Thai and the guys do not go soft on me because I'm female. And I would be severely p*ssed off if they did! There are men who have to go lighter on me because they are much bigger than me, or more skilled, but equally so there are men which I have to be careful not to hurt. Admittedly the other women in my club don't like to be hit as hard as I, but they are all very small (50-60kg) and it has nothing to do with a difference in genitalia.

[Pacificshore]

I'm surprised no one else mentioned this - apart from "chivalry" and the like, it's pretty much a lose-lose situation for them. If they win, they bet up a girl, and if they lose, they got beaten up by a girl. It's irritating, but I can see where they're coming from.

I don't get mad over it, I just politely refuse to fight a girl, in contact-sparring anyway. Light-contact, point-sparring is fine, because I'm not aiming to do any physical damage. However, there's no way in hell I'd fight a girl in a full-contact sparring situation, even with full gear on.

 

Yes, it has to do with chivarly, but I wouldn't call it stigma.

 

Don't we see this in the animal kingdom? Don't lions usually only pick fights with other lions, and not lionesses?

 

I think using the animal kingdom as a reason or to back up your arguments is pretty annoying really. What in all the hells has that got to do with you as a human being? Many animals kill their own young, I hardly think that is pertinant when related to human beings.

 

I'm personally reasonably anti-"chivalry", and do you know why? I see it as sexism - from the woman. If a woman wants to be treated as an equal, to interact with men as a person and not be seen as less by them, why should a man be expected to then treat them as if they were made of china? It's nice to be romantic with your girlfriend or whatever, but then I like to return the favour - I do not expect special treatment and find it unpleasant even if it's along the lines of politeness as it simply reinforces my image as a woman and thus an alien creature.

 

I do Muay Thai and the guys do not go soft on me because I'm female. And I would be severely p*ssed off if they did! There are men who have to go lighter on me because they are much bigger than me, or more skilled, but equally so there are men which I have to be careful not to hurt. Admittedly the other women in my club don't like to be hit as hard as I, but they are all very small (50-60kg) and it has nothing to do with a difference in genitalia.

 

Ah Fenris:

 

At least your one woman that talks the talk and walks the walk

 

Unfortunately there aren't many women that can do the same , and I mean that in a good way too

[battousai16]

i agree with that. as long as y'all want equal rights, equal pay, and equal opportunities, you can be sure i'll go in equally as hard as i would with a guy.

 

the reason I sigh when i see i've been paired up with a girl is you have to go out of your way to walk on egg shells to avoid offending them. personally, i tend to look at the shoulders when i spar. something about seeing movements coming earlier. i look at everybodies shoulders, men and women, but if i'm against a woman i'm suddenly stairing at her breasts...

 

or in take down situations, you can't just instinctually go for what you would normally on a guy, because whether you're anywhere near anything or whether or not you had the intent, a slight miss and you're called for sexual harassment. i have no qualms sparring or grappling with women i know and who know me, since no problems come up then. but if it's someone newer or it's in a tournament setting with someone i haven't met before (in something like team sparring or the like, where you're not necessarily seperated by gender), i get a bit hesitant.

[kle1n]

yeah I dont want to do it ever again too.i did it once and was beeing quite soft and nice.then she started moaning and threatend to beat me up if i kept on beeing hardcore