Genesys Posted September 12, 2004 Share Posted September 12, 2004 P - Do you have any idea how fast you were going? Y - I'm just trying to keep up with the flow of traffic P - There's no traffic around here Y - I know, they're so far ahead, I'll never catch up now "I wasn't speeding, I was qualifying" Did you lose some weight officer? You look much thinner than in that picture on your nightstand. You're a public servant... get me a glass of water! As soon as he's done writing, take it from him and tell him you're gonna check it over for mistakes. When you're done, crumple it up and throw it on the ground. Say "I really don't need another worthless piece of paper from the state, I've already got 8 or 9 of those things floating around in here." "I own this car, I'll do as I please. I also own the highway, my taxes paid for that too, so I'll go as fast as I want." Sensei at end of class: "Does anyone have any questions?"Student: "Yeah, when do we get to do the slow-mo, mid-air, matrix style moves?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
47MartialMan Posted September 13, 2004 Share Posted September 13, 2004 P-You turn on a no left turn Y-Yes, I am right-handed P-Didnt you see that red light? Y-Why, is this the hooker section? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
knucks Posted September 17, 2004 Share Posted September 17, 2004 Dont call them PIGS...they dont like that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheDevilAside Posted September 19, 2004 Share Posted September 19, 2004 "oink oink" hehe. "If you're going through hell, keep going." - Sir Winston Churchill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
47MartialMan Posted September 19, 2004 Share Posted September 19, 2004 Careful, we have a law enforcement officer on board. We do not want too get too offensive. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beiner Posted September 21, 2004 Share Posted September 21, 2004 After the offcier is done writing your ticket, say: Thanx for not looking in the trunk. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gcav Posted September 22, 2004 Share Posted September 22, 2004 PIG = Pride, Integrity and Guts. When you walk past a cop, sniff the air and say "I smell bacon", we love that one. Train like your life depends on it....Because it does. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
47MartialMan Posted September 22, 2004 Share Posted September 22, 2004 PIG = Pride, Integrity and Guts. When you walk past a cop, sniff the air and say "I smell bacon", we love that one. Or a "Oink here, and a Oink Oink There" While on the subject, anyone know how the slang "pig" started? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheDevilAside Posted September 22, 2004 Share Posted September 22, 2004 Pray tell.. "If you're going through hell, keep going." - Sir Winston Churchill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
foreveryoung001 Posted September 25, 2004 Share Posted September 25, 2004 P: did yo know the spped limit was 55 mile per hour? Y: Yes officer, but I wasn't going to be out that long. P: Didn't you see the "stop" sign back there? Y: yes officer, but I don't believe everything I read. In the immortal words of Steven Wright: I had to go to court the other day because a cop wrote me a ticket. I pleaded 'insanity'. I said "your Honor, would anyone in their right mind park in the passing lane?" Student: "Why did you hit that guy with a chair? Why didn't you use your karate?"Master: "Hitting him with a chair was the only karate I could think of at the time."Lesson: Practice until you don't have to think. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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