Kiddo

Lol. A few Irish inventions. (No offense Irish people. Just picture it as blonde instead) A helicopter ejection seat and a Solar powered light

That means girl?!!?! Ahh crap... I'm a boy... Time to change my name I think... Anyway. I've had other blunders before... There was this time we were doing our basics up and down the hall. We were doing thrust kick and some black belt kept doing it wrong. So our instructor made us do pressups and after ten I got up and went straight in frontstance. I had this really big adrenaline rush. Making me fell like I could take anyone on. What I didn't know is that everyone else in the class was in hegadachi (Standing stance. I can't spell japanese words) but I was in front stance... So I felt so pumped up that I didn't listen to him say "Step forward into frontstance, downward block" and I just thought we were just continuting with our thrust kicks... So when he shouted "Ashumi" (something like that, begin) I went straight into the strongest kick I had done. Unfortunately it went completely wrong. I kicked with my right foot, my left foot came completely of the ground (I think it was actually parallel with the ground) and I went flying in the air. When I landed the instructor noticed and everyone had a good laugh... Another time we were all doing this weird stretch. We were in 2s and one of us was lying on our backs on the floor. The other person stood with a foot next to each shoulder and had his hands out. The idea was for us to hold onto his/her ankles and lift our legs up. Our feet were to touch their hands and then go back to the floor to our instructors count... I promise you, I didn't feel it coming... Our instructor told us to raise our legs up. First thing I knew I was happily raising my legs. Next thing I knew this humongous fart was flying through my stomach at the speed of a japanese bullet train. And it had to bloody sound like a bomb didn't it? EVERYONE heard it. And all started laughing at me It wasnt that funny... I think that's about it. If I remember anymore I'll say. Anyway. Off to change my name now!

I don't like it... Not very good.

I like: Starwars, LOTR, ..... Teenage Mutant Hero turtles 3. (don't laugh! They can do bloomin' good stunts considering the suits they're in!) Face off is quite good. Terminator 1&2, the third one looks like it's gonna bloomin rule! ANY and I mean ANY Bruce Lee film, He is the best martial artist ever. And this film I saw a bit off last night looked quite good.. Think it was called Mercury Rising? Bruce Willis and the "artistic" kid in it? Any other fighting films and action Kiddo P.S I know I use the word bloomin alot, It's to stop me from swearing. Bad habits you see Too many films... Lol

You could have something that doesn't make sense like "The blind artists" or "The paralyzed athletes" Lol.. I dunno... The unmusical musicians? LMAO. No? Suit yourself... Melivarez? I made that up I think but it sounds cool. QUICK NOTE: If you use any or these names and become famous I wanna get some money from it because it wasn't your unique name! COPYRIGHT!

I am weeping willow! Lol. it says I'm beautiful. Wait till my mates at school hear this, they'll wet themselves laughin'

Heh. I like that one...

Jokes?! You want JOKES?! Well here ya go: A man walks into a bar: "ow" Your mommas so dumb she got locked in a supermarket and starved to death Your mommas so dumb she got run over by a parked car Your mommas so dumb she tripped over a cordless phone Your mommas so fat she went down the stairs and they said "1 at a time please" Your momma smells so bad I look forward to her farts. A sheriff walks into a saloon/bar thing one day and goes to the bar tender: "have you seen a man with a brown paper bag hat, brown paper bag shirt, brown paper bag trousers and brown paper bag shoes?" The bartender replies: "No I haven't, rustle" (never got that joke myself..." How do you drown a submarine full of blondes? You knock on the hatch.. (No offense blondes out there... I'm one too!) Blonde Inventions: Solar Powered Lamp Helicopter ejection seat What's a blondes chat up line? "NEXT!" What's a brunettes chat up line? "Are the blondes gone yet?" How does a blonde turn on the light after a "good night out" ? Open the car door Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side... David Beckham was really nervous because tomorrow he had a very important football match so he asked his manager (sven o' course) how could he stop himself from being too nervous and get a good nights sleep. Sven replied: "Do a jugsaw puzzle" So that night David went home and started his puzzle. But later Sven was disturbed by a phone call. It was David. "David? It's 2 in the bloomin' morning! what are you doing?!" "sorry sir, it's just I really need help on this puzzle!" "errgh. Fine then.. Whats the picture on the box?" "It's an orange tiger..." Sven thinks for a minute.... "Oh for god's sake David put the FROSTED FLAKES away and go to sleep!" No offense David.. It can also be a blonde joke just couldn't think of a beginning for that..... Now for a grand finalie with my favourite! A women is walking down the street on her way to work when she suddenly stops in amazement: There's a man, jumping up and down on a manhole cover shouting at the top of his lungs "SEVENTEEN! SEVENTEEEEN!" The lady decides to be brave and talk to this man. She walks up to him and politely says: "Excuse me sir," "SEVENTEEN! SEVENTE-eh what?" "I was just wondering, what on Earth are you doing?" "Ooo. Yes, what am I doing? Well every morning on the way to work I stop and start jumping up and down on a manhole cover shouting seventeen..." "But why?" The women asks curiously... "Well it gives you a morning rush you see... Look, try it!" "Oh, no. I don't think I will thanks..." "No, go on! Try it! "Oh, ok then. If I have to..." So the man walks backwards off the manhole cover and the women steps onto it... She makes the puniest jump I've ever seen and whispers: "Seventeen?" The man laughs and replies: "No! You have to jump HIGH and shout LOUD... Try again! It's fun! You'll see!" So the women starts again but gradually gets higher in her jumps and louder with her shouts: "Seventeen! Seventeen! SEVENTEEN! SEVENTEEEEEEN!" Now just as she makes a really high jump the man crouches down and pulls away the manhole cover, the women, as expected "Goes SEVENTEEN! SEVENTEEN! SEVENTE-AAHHH ****!" Now the man pulls the manhole cover back on and starts jumping and shouting at the top of his voice: "EIGHTEEN! EIGHTEEEEEEN!" Thats my favourite! Is it just me or has this smily just found something on the internet he shouldn't have? Thank you! I'll be here all night! Make sure to tip your admins! Good night!

My mates are really starting to * me off now... I try and keep it a secret from people who don't know but they just have to blurt it out don't they? it's: "he's a blackbelt in karate" I mean: Big whop. Not that good is it? Hundreds of people are black... Everytime someone finds out it's something like: "heeeeya!" or "ooohhh.. Let's see then... Hit me" And it's getting annoying I guess all you can do is ignore..

ramymensa: what on earth did your ex do to deserve that? lol I never thought that I was any good at karate. Well. I thought my technique was ok but when it came to my strength I basically sucked... Then it was fun ol' kick the bag time... Did a thrust kick and my instructor went further than I thought he would... I mean I didn't think he would even move! I bet you all have, but have you seen "enter the dragon"? Theres that kick bruce does to the man who killed his sister which I can't get enough of. (the kick he does before the man gets the two bottles and smashes them together) I know that's all set up but if you think about it it's real... And someone can do that... That's what amazes me... Wish I could do it that good... Kiddo

Just say it was your teenage hormones... Always your hormones, never fails... Wish I could make holes in a wall... It hurts instead though... If the hormones one does fail though hhere are some backup ones.... 1. I was p!$$ed off 2. "well maybe we should get a BRICK wall then!" 3. "Wasn't me" 4. Er... Never seen it before (You didn't do it, no one saw you do it, they can't prove anythin) 5. What the bl**dy hell!? Whered that come from?! Or. 6. Satan possessed me for a minute and I couldn't get out... It was horrible... Truely horrible... (then burst into tears) These are the things I always do Never fails... lol

I agree with the others. There's a limit you can learn from books but an instructor can teach you more and correct you

In my style there have been lots of courses at least 2 a year. We have a "summer camp" which is a week of karate and a grading on thursday and a contest on friday. And there is also an anual winter camp. I went to the summer camp once and it was quite good, we trained a few hours a day then I passed my gradin' So I think they're worth it yea

I do Shotokan Karate, I am a 1st dan and I can go for my 2nd in december... Doubt I will straight away though.. Kiddo